


Flaky, Flitty, Flighty

by offwhxte



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Angry Reid, Anniversary, Apologetic Aaron Hotchner, Dharma and Greg Dialogue, Humor, M/M, excuses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-27
Updated: 2017-06-27
Packaged: 2018-11-19 13:57:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11314836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/offwhxte/pseuds/offwhxte
Summary: Aaron and Spencer devise a plan to make an excuse to get out of Garcia's Anniversary Party for them. Of course, things go awry quickly.





	Flaky, Flitty, Flighty

"I can't believe we were sucked into spending our anniversary dinner with the team. At _Garcia's_ house, no less. Have we learned nothing from the last year," Aaron groaned, chopping what was left of the mushrooms for whatever crazy breakfast Spencer decided he wanted to whip up as soon as he woke up that morning.  

"I know," Spencer said, almost whining as he blindly dug through the cabinet full of pots and pans, "But she already made plans, and if we ditch her now, it'll hurt her feelings." 

"But why don't we tell them a little white lie?" Aaron asked, placing the knife down and bracing his palms on the kitchen island, unashamedly watching Spencer's bottom as he bent down to look under the sink. "Some reason we have to be alone." 

"Like..." Spencer peeked out and raised an eyebrow, "Like we ate too much Indian take out?" 

"Sure," Aaron said, completely unconvincingly, "We could say that. Or how 'bout this, how 'bout we tell them that we're having a big fight?" 

"Woahhhh," Spencer stood up, a silly grin on his face, "Marital problems! That's good. They don't want to think about you being mad." 

Aaron rushed to the dining table to grab the phone.  

"Then we can save the Indian story for Thanksgiving," Spencer offered. Aaron was already dialing Garcia.  

"Hey. Yeah, I know tomorrow is-- Garcia, listen." Aaron leaned on the counter across from Spencer, making a face to his partner (who covered his mouth with his hand as he laughed) before speaking in his Hotch voice, "We-- We have a problem for tomorrow night. Well, I don't know how to say this except to say it. Spencer and I need to be alone to work out some problems." 

The younger man just smiled and giggled under his breath, cracking eggs in a big bowl to his left. 

Aaron paused for a moment, thinking. He looked to Spencer with a panicked look on his face, "Um, what kind of problems, you ask?" 

Spencer raised his eyebrows, and smirked as he stage-whispered, "You're into women's clothes and it's starting to freak me out."  

Aaron pressed his lips together tight, waving his hand to shoo the genius away. 

"Well, it's really-- It's nothing really to worry about," Aaron pinned the phone between his cheek and his shoulder as he picked up the knife again. "We're just very different people, and... well, you know he can be a little bit flaky sometimes."  

Spencer paused and looked up to Aaron, his hand frozen above the bowl with an egg clutched in his palm. Aaron's smile at doing something so against the rules quickly disappeared. 

"Not flaky," he said, increasing Spencer's distasteful expression, "More flitty." 

Spencer was just staring him with blank anger. The egg burst in his hand.  

"F-Flighty?" Aaron almost whimpered before quickly bringing himself back together, "Garcia, I gotta go." 

As soon as he hung the phone up, he gripped it in both hands and stared into the ground. He could feel Spencer's eyes piercing a hole into his brain.  

"Well, our brilliant plan worked. Boy, are we brilliant. You can call Morgan now, tell him we're not coming," Aaron held the phone toward Spencer, who just kept his eyes locked on him, his mouth slightly open with small, puffed breaths coming out.  

He looked down to the phone and back at Aaron, " _Flighty_ _?_ " 

 "I had to make up _something,"_ Aaron offered. 

"Why did you pick that?" 

"Because I had to say something she'd believe," Aaron said, once again without thinking. Spencer's head jerked back, his eyebrows raised and his eyes daring him to keep talking. " _She'd_ believe. Not _me_. Garcia. Damn her and her false perceptions of you not based on a single shred of evidence." 

Spencer nodded and took the phone, dialing someone quickly and holding the phone to his ear, locking eyes with Aaron, "Morgan. Listen, we're not gonna be able to make it tomorrow. Yeah, Aaron and I are having a huge fight."  

Aaron gave him a wanton look, but it went unanswered.  

"No," the genius looked down to pick at his nails, "That's not going to work. Because I'm never having sex with him again."  

Aaron's face paled and he leaned on the counter.  

"I'll call you tomorrow," Spencer hung up the phone and held his hands up, "There! Now we have the whole day to ourselves." 

The older man fumbled with the phone as it was shoved into his chest and Spencer disappeared down the hallway. He watched the younger man go before looking down at the phone and back at the doorway, "So... so do you wanna go out somewhere or just stay home and cuddle?" 

The bedroom door slammed shut and Aaron leaned on the sink. He looked down to his watch. He silently counted each time the smaller clock moved from second to second. At a whopping twenty seconds, their door swung open and banged into the wall beside it. Spencer appeared, his shoulders slumped and his head tilted in defeat. 

"You really think I'm flighty?" 

"Sometimes you can be irresponsible with your time," Aaron replied, hoping honesty would get him something other than the silent treatment, which was even worse when it was Dr. Spencer Reid on the other side of that silence. 

"Okay," Spencer nodded slowly, "Okay, I forgive you." 

"What?" 

"I forgive you. I'm not gonna fight with you on our anniversary, now can we make up?" Spencer whined, practically stamping his foot. 

"S-sure, you wanna watch a movie or..." Aaron closed his mouth as Spencer began undoing the buttons on his shirt and sending a devilish smile his way before backing into the room. Aaron dropped the phone and ran after him. 

   
   
 


End file.
